Thursday, January 20, 2011

Fear of Becoming Uninteresting

I like to fancy myself relatively entertaining. I mean, I'm no Ellen Degeneres (yes, that is the comedian that popped into my mind) or anything, but I think I have a certain charm (::wink, wink::).

Post-baby, I have a fear of becoming incredibly dull. What if I get to a point where the only things I want to talk about include baby excretions or babbling?

My biggest fear is conducting a State of the Union on potty training.

(Can you envision one side of the room vigorously applauding and giving a standing O for No. 1 and the other side for No. 2? "And we are looking to pee in the potty!" ::applause and cheering commence:: Okay, I'm done.)

Not that I'm actually a stranger to this type of behavior. I have enlightened many a folk with some thrilling cat stories in my day.

But who doesn't want to hear about Leia knocking on our door at 4:30 a.m. because she's hungry? Or the fact that Luke fetches? Or our new cat tree? Nobody? Anybody?

I do find this post ironic considering the entire purpose of this blog is to talk about my child and my cats, but maybe that is the point: we do better in packs.

Got a good cat story? Hit me with it. Did your child throw up all over your work outfit this morning, leaving you 15 minutes late for work? Tell me about it. Do you feel like swooning over that milk smile your little one just shot at you for no apparent reason? Love it.

The ultimate fear is becoming "that parent" to the "outsiders."

As a non-parent I hated hearing phrases like, "You'll understand when you're a parent." I felt talked down to. Now I get it.

It's not that you become a better person as a parent. It's not that you become smarter. Instead, your brain shifts and you find yourself entertained sharing stories about naps, spit up and diapers.

There's got to be hope for me. I can be entertained by all those things, but still be interesting to the rest of the world. Right?